Angela Bassett is one of Hollywood’s most celebrated actresses. She wowed us as Tina Turner in the 1993 movie, What’s Love Got to Do with It, alongside Laurence Fishburne who played Ike Turner.
When I read, Friends: A Love Story, a memoir that Bassett wrote with husband, Courtney B. Vance several years ago, I was even more inspired by her!
The two of them have beamed as a shining example of Black love in Tinseltown for 24 years – a feat that is not easily pulled off in an industry such as theirs.
But despite the spotlight, Bassett has always remained down to earth and always keeps it a buck. In a recent article, Bassett shared her thoughts on why she does not radiate when someone says she looks young or “good for her age.” Bassett believes the latter is a “back-handed compliment.” To her, if someone looks good, age should not be attached to it.
We have all heard the saying, “Black Don’t Crack.” This is a phrase that Black women have owned, and it speaks to how youthful we remain over the years because of the melanin factor. It’s no secret that we live in such a youth driven culture that many women are in a race against time to maintain a youthful appearance.
For years, it seems that society has been obsessed with the way women age. Men age and become “distinguished,” while women age and are expected to pull a Benjamin Button.
There is even a new phenomenon known as “age shaming,” for which Sarah Jessica Parker recently spoke out against. While doing press for And Just Like That. . . the reboot of Sex and the City, SJP expressed her agitation In an interview with Vogue. People were not kind when images from the show began circling on social media. Some trolls thought it was funny to share pictures of the Golden Girls to poke fun at Parker and her other co-stars, who are also in their 50s. SJP was over it. “What am I going to do? Stop aging?” has it come to this? Are women expected to look the same for 50 years?
Suffice it to say, I think we are programmed from the time we are born to embrace certain expectations about how humans should age.
A few years ago, my daughter and I were in the park doing cartwheels. A little girl, who was no older than 5, came up to me and said, “Hey, you’re too old to be doing cartwheels!” My daughter and I looked at each other and laughed. I thought it was interesting. Who knew that at age 47, cartwheels and any other gymnastic-like activities would be forbidden! The point is – this kid obviously believed that turning flips was set aside for humans her age and that I should have known better.
Why should there be any surprise when we see people of any age doing anything? There are 90-year-olds who run marathons. There are 80-year-olds who scuba dive. As long as the body can handle it, I say do it! There should be no limits. No two people are going to age the same.
“I think when we take care of ourselves, we do look good for our age, whatever age that is, you know?” Angela Bassett’s words may resonate with the masses. To Bassett’s point, maybe we are all supposed to age well – whatever that may look like for each of us.
Aging should be celebrated! Every return around the sun should be met with a smile. While I understand Bassett’s perspective, I still love to see women living their best lives and looking good while doing it when they are what society deems as “middle aged.”
We may never get to a point where we stop telling women they look good for their age. But we can and should embrace aging gracefully.